Making videos - Not your Grandma's Video camera!

... well, at least not MY grandma's camera.  We're having so much fun editing the footage I took at the wedding, and Will has already cleaned up and added sparkle to some of the dark, wobbly pictures I took at the reception.  It was a fun, fun event, and even though we are still recovering, it was so very worth it. 

I really am enjoying the graphic quality Will brings out, and I'm already trying some of the effects on some of the stills I took. 

Pictures, pictures, woo hoo!

I got a video camera for my birthday last month, and used it some at my daughter's wedding last week... now I'm learning a complex program that will let me do many things... many, many, many things!!! to the video and photographs.  Maybe a dvd for Yuletide would be fun?  If so, what do I want to include?

I'm finding this fun, and think I'll enjoy learning more about the process.

Inspiration all around me

I take so much for granted, that did not exist when I was growing up 50 years ago - I've been watching Hubble telescope footage, a show about the biography of the earth - with lots of subtle and realistic computer graphics that help to explain complex ideas. 

How can I complain about lack of ideas to start up my own creativity?  It is easier to become discouraged by the volume of other people's past creativity, and question the worth of your own ideas.  I have amazing access to so many images and ideas, from all of history and nature, information from many cultures other than the one I grew up in... wow!  How easy it is to become numb to the bombardment of information, and how difficult it can be to see that one's own creativity is a contribution to something, rather than just a re-iteration of what has already been done.  Even the commercials are so complex, artistic in many ways, and culturally revealing.  How do you start, when you feel like what you may have to say is insignificant?

My own answer is probably different than everyone else's... but also much the same?  You make something that comes out of yourself, or helps you understand something new.  It's your own view on the world, or something that just feels good to your inside self, or a reaction to events you are watching around you.

I don't know why I'm drawn to a number of different methods of creativity, but I seem to have a hard time resisting something new that intrigues me.  I know that some of my beadwork is really a form of meditation, with repetition, color, and tactile factors.  I know that some of my painting and drawing is a way of expressing emotions that I don't seem to be able to vent as well in any other way.  I used to use singing for healing, and I find myself doing that again, even though I'm no longer singing in public at all. 

I love the tactile nature of quilting, and the results are useful, usually, and color and form allow a lot of self expression.  I used to enjoy short story writing, and I still like to write if I have something I want to say in a clear or careful way.  I find fabric dye and paint a joyful medium, and later I get to cut it up and use it in something wonderful.  It can be hard to make myself cut some pieces up, though, because I like them too much.  I'll admit to a weakness for costuming (playing dress up for adults! lol!), and I sometimes don't know when to stop with the beading.

So, what to do with all this?  How do I prioritize, choose what I'll enjoy doing the most, or what I'll be happy with when I have a result?  I need this place to work out my journey, maybe a bit at a time is the best way to approach it all.

I just need to be cognitive and patient.  NOT my best talents, but that's part of my process, it seems.

Playing with new toys!

We took some photos and video at the wedding last weekend, and now I'm learning to play with them, I mean, clean them up and make them fun to look at... not in the same way as Will, just a basic program to start with.  I'm hoping to collect other people's photos and have lots to enjoy learning this new skill.  It is related to other artistic skills I continue to try to develop, so maybe I'll learn lots from it.

Any of you who have photos, either of this event or other family photos or video, please send them to me!!!  

Pretty please?  With sugar on top?

Such a beautiful day today, it makes me want to go to the beach or the little duck lake, and make more videos to play with... but we're both too much in recovery state to go out and do it.  Yet!

Maybe I should Blog more?

We are recuperating from a trip to Walnut Cr. for Susie's wedding, and we are both pretty tired. The trip went very well, we planned and took what we needed, and were pretty organized, but hauling ourselves and our luggage all over two airports, meeting lots of new and old friends, participating in rehearsal and wedding, too much fun for us!

I was delighted that my clothes were a good match for the wedding site in a garden, and that it was not super hot. Everything went exceptionally well, everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves, and Will and I even danced a bit - so we are still recovering. I thought that Susie's friends were great - but I always liked them, so no surprise there. Nik's wonderful family were so nice, I wish there had been more time with them, but I enjoyed meeting extended family and friends that were family, really.

Merrie liked her jewelry, the quilt arrived at Nik's work, Susie's friends liked their matching earrings, also the pearl and crystal sets, so all was really smooth, on my small efforts towards the event.

We took some photos and videos, and I'm really hoping to get photos from some of the other camera wielding guests, as well as the professional who seemed to be doing a great job. Most of my photos came out pretty dark, but I can play with them and make them better. Both of the evening events were not bright enough without my flash, but I didn't want to be distracting.

The good news is that Quan Yin's tumor is not the big "C", it's a lipoma, so no problem. I know she's getting older, at least 14 I think, with lots of grey in her orange eyebrows, but she seems pretty well except for some arthritis.

We will be much more rested shortly, and will be out and about on more adventures in the big world, as well as time staying at home being creative, playing all kinds of music, doing computer "things" like playing with our new video camera and the results, some art, quilting, beading, cooking, swimming, taking a class or two at OLLI and generally enjoying life!

I'm pretty sure that I should be Blogging my creativity results, at least. I was looking at my photos and videos and finding myself freshly inspired to paint and draw, and also to learn more about the computer applications for art. I guess the reason I want to blog about it, is to share the journey, and keep moving along. Besides, it's probably good for me, nobody has to read it, unless they feel like it!

Priorities, people and learning to cope

I try to be cognative about my priorities, I work on it daily, and try to put my energies into what is the most practical and valuable thing I am able to do at that time. I also try not to overdo it, and that can be discouraging because I have to say "no" a lot (especially to myself!), but does result in more times when I'm able to do what I really I need to do, and lets me have more time that isn't severely painful, or when I can't do anything at all.

I've come to terms with it, most of the time, but occasionally I find it very difficult to deal with. I find that it helps to verbally acknowledge both the desire to do something, and the emotions, and then the fact that it's not such a great idea. I'm trying NOT to be my old Wonder Woman self, act like my body is a "tank", and then pay for it later with excessive recovery time.

This has some mixed results, and lately is partially responsible for a rift with someone I thought was a close friend, who has some major physical challenges of her own. She has gone into a big denial phase, for many reasons, and I remind her of my reality too often to be comfortable for her... so we've pretty much gone different ways.

It's a pity, but I am comfortable with my choices for now, and I'm convinced that denial just does not work for me at this point. When I act on denial, I end up even more limited for a time, and miserable, so what's the point?

This makes me wonder if reminding other people of their vulnerability, and non-immortality, is what makes it so very hard to be disabled, physically ill, or otherwise different in this society. I have been treated pretty rudely in public by strangers, and it reflects a great deal of fear, I believe.

So many "dear friends" from my past have dissappeared abruptly as soon as I had obvious physical limitations.

Are most people that afraid? It's a terrible thought, because most of us will eventually have some physical limitations to deal with, visible or not, and whether we choose to admit it or not... it's real, and I think coping with it, and adapting as much as possible, is much wiser than hiding from it.

Speaking of being a bit indulged...

I feel very loved, and though of, this Yuletide. My dear stepdaughter, who means the world to me, took time from her insanely busy life to find and send me a killer lavender bathrobe, a bit small, but so pretty! It was definitely the thought that counted, here, because she called us three days in a row, just because she had a chance and wanted to talk to us. She is so amazing! There's a magic frame, too... I mean computer frame, and I can put digital pictures in there, and use them to paint from, as well as putting them in a place where they can change and we can enjoy them! I have an idea about that...

My beloved husband went a bit nuts and not only got me the sewing machine I desperately needed, he got the very best we could possibly afford, because he knew I'd enjoy it. I had earlier asked for some special painting dvds by Don Andrews that I wanted very much, and/or some paints... but when my sewing machine was going, I thought he'd get it INSTEAD of the painting supplies.

Nope, they are here, too, and I've already seen one of the dvds and it was very much better than I would have thought it could be! Plus, he got me the paints... best of the best brand for my style and purposes, special ingredients, and they were not cheap! I can paint with them for months!!! Very special stuff, with ground turquoise, tiger's eye, other gemstones for heavy granulation, and I love the textures I can achieve with them, that are not possible with "standard" paints.

I love things I can use to make something else, use with my creativity, or learn something I'm interested in. I also got gadgets to use my Sandisc in the car, new headphones which I needed that retract, all things that I can use in my daily life.

Stuff isn't love, but being thought about, and cared about, and sometimes seeing that reflected in stuff, is love. I need to know I matter, and today it feels like I really do matter, even though I can't do everything I want to do.