Priorities, people and learning to cope

I try to be cognative about my priorities, I work on it daily, and try to put my energies into what is the most practical and valuable thing I am able to do at that time. I also try not to overdo it, and that can be discouraging because I have to say "no" a lot (especially to myself!), but does result in more times when I'm able to do what I really I need to do, and lets me have more time that isn't severely painful, or when I can't do anything at all.

I've come to terms with it, most of the time, but occasionally I find it very difficult to deal with. I find that it helps to verbally acknowledge both the desire to do something, and the emotions, and then the fact that it's not such a great idea. I'm trying NOT to be my old Wonder Woman self, act like my body is a "tank", and then pay for it later with excessive recovery time.

This has some mixed results, and lately is partially responsible for a rift with someone I thought was a close friend, who has some major physical challenges of her own. She has gone into a big denial phase, for many reasons, and I remind her of my reality too often to be comfortable for her... so we've pretty much gone different ways.

It's a pity, but I am comfortable with my choices for now, and I'm convinced that denial just does not work for me at this point. When I act on denial, I end up even more limited for a time, and miserable, so what's the point?

This makes me wonder if reminding other people of their vulnerability, and non-immortality, is what makes it so very hard to be disabled, physically ill, or otherwise different in this society. I have been treated pretty rudely in public by strangers, and it reflects a great deal of fear, I believe.

So many "dear friends" from my past have dissappeared abruptly as soon as I had obvious physical limitations.

Are most people that afraid? It's a terrible thought, because most of us will eventually have some physical limitations to deal with, visible or not, and whether we choose to admit it or not... it's real, and I think coping with it, and adapting as much as possible, is much wiser than hiding from it.